A Series of Open Letters
by MadameVP
Summary: A series of open letters between Brittany and Santana. Will try to update weekly. beta: HopefulessFanficWanderer :)
1. Chapter 1

_Dear Santana,_

_I know okay? I know about you and Quinn. I'm not angry at you, I don't have the right to be, after all I told you to leave, I told you go and find a girl who is as hot and smart as you, I just didn't think it would be Quinn, I just didn't expect that…What does she have that I don't Santana?_

_I'm more hurt than anything, we may have split up Santana, but I still thought I was your best friend, I thought you were saving that spot for me? I guess I was mistaken. Do you know what it felt like to hear about you and Quinn through someone else, it felt as if I'd been hit by a truck going over 100 miles an hour. My heart was racing, my mind was spinning, I wanted to hit something, I wanted to cry, but that's when I realised that you aren't mine to cry over anymore… but I still cried, it's like I had no control over my emotions, it was like a river bursting its banks… uncontrollable and unstoppable._

_I don't know how long I cried for exactly, it felt like hours, days even. I don't know when I realized that this needs to stop, this self-destructing love of ours, but I just did. It's not doing either of us any good. While we love each other we just keep hurting each other over and over. How long must this cycle go on? _

_We always seem to make the same mistakes over and over and neither of us can help it. I want to let go of you but I just don't think I can, I promise you I'll try, but until the day that I can, I'm yours, proudly so._

_P.s. I got full marks on my SATs, while I sat in the office with Sam and Principle Figgins, I couldn't help but think how proud you would be of me, I could just imagine you telling me that you knew I could do it, but instead I had Sam and Figgins questioning my result, even accusing me of cheating, I don't think they realised just how much it hurt._

_Forever yours_

_Brittany _


	2. Chapter 2

_Dear Brittany,_

_Seeing you at the wedding, seeing you happy with someone else other than me, it broke me. Seeing you happily dancing with Sam, it made me wish that everything was different, most of all it made me wish that I was the one dancing with you._

_I slept with Quinn that night, I'm not sure why I'm telling you, I feel like I owe you the truth. I can only hope that you hear it off me first and not someone else. I could blame the alcohol and say that I had no clue what I was doing but that would be a lie and I promised that I wouldn't lie to you anymore, I've lied to you too many times before._

_I knew exactly what I was doing when I slept with her, I thought that maybe it would take away the bitterness of seeing you with someone else. I think part of me wished that you would catch us, just so you could feel that pain that I felt. I wished this so bad but now I'm glad that you didn't because after it was all over I realized you were right all along Britt, it is better with feelings. I can't help but wonder how different things would be if I'd have been honest to both myself and you from the beginning, would we still be together now? Would we be happy? I hope to think so._

_I find myself scrolling through my phonebook, my finger hovering over the call button when your name appears, but I just can't bring myself to call you. I want to hear your voice Britt, I really do, but I can't stand to know that you're happy with someone else._

_Sometimes I wish that you would call me first, that you would give me a sign, a reason not to give up on our love, but as the days go on and I have no calls from you I realize that maybe this time apart is needed. We both have some growing to do and as much as I hate to admit this, we need to do the growing separately._

_You'll always be my soul mate Brittany and I only hope that you know that I'll never love anyone as much as I love you, but I'm going to try my best to move on, to be the girl that I know I can be, Just for you. I can do this for you and only for you._

_You stole my heart from the very beginning, and it'll forever be yours. Keep it safe Britt._

_Always yours_

_Santana_

_P.S. I got my first job today in the big apple. It's nothing major but it means I get to sing and I get to dance, I can't help but wish that you were the one dancing with me. You always have been an amazing dancer; no-one could ever keep up._


End file.
